I’m on my way to Washington, D.C. today for a work meeting. I really do hate to fly, but the people watching always makes it worthwhile. My flight is from Houston to Austin then on to D.C with a plane change in the middle. On the first leg of the flight, I boarded mid-way through in the early B section on Southwest. Everyone had boarded and we were all getting snuggly in our seats as one woman slowly sauntered onto the plane.
She was one of those loud people that I always find amusing. Loud clothes and jewelry, loud haircut, loud voice. The flight attendant stopped her mid way down the aisle and informed her (over the speaker system) that the plane was full from there to the back. As she turned to go back, he then informed her (over the speaker system) that the overheads were full from the front to the middle. She was so very confused. As she stood there, bewildered, with tons of carry on baggage and all her glory, one of the flight attendants came up to help her.
“Ma’am, you can put your bag up here and find a middle seat toward the front.”
The woman was flustered.
“I don’t want to sit away from my bags,” she lamented.
“Here,” the flight attendant said, “I’ll help put your bag up and you go ahead and find a seat.”
As she tried to lift the smallish bag with the tags still on it, she winced.
“Um, I can’t lift this bag, ma’am,” she said. “What on earth do you have in here?”
Dead body? I thought out loud.
“Well, I got my meat in there,” the woman replied bluntly. “It’s full of Texas steaks. Texas steaks are the best. I never leave home without them.”
So my dead body assumption was pretty spot on, if you ask me.
This really happened today. And apparently she’s taking her ‘Texas meat’ all the way to Washington, D.C. where the meat sucks, I gather.